


Triggers & Thieves

by manicr



Category: Dark Avengers (Comic), Marvel (Comics), New Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Feral Behavior, Fluff and Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-01
Updated: 2015-02-01
Packaged: 2018-03-10 00:43:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,938
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3270383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/manicr/pseuds/manicr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Weaponized trigger scent released on Daken and Wolverine to turn them against their teammates goes awry, results not as advertised, cue confusion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Triggers & Thieves

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts), [gealach](https://archiveofourown.org/users/gealach/gifts).



> **Original prompt:** _"Logan and Daken are fighting again when a third opponent (evil scientist, oh noes?) hits them with an experimental something (a trigger scent for feral mutants?) that makes their animal instincts go wild (like that’s never been done before, I know)._  
>  But because Daken immediately starts pumping out calming pheromones to try to counteract it, the results are not violent as had been intended. Instead, Logan goes full Papa!Wolvie and decides to wash his baby. Daken just relaxes into it and seems blissfully content.  
> And the X-Men/Dark Avengers/whatever bystanders are completely beside themselves. Photos are captured for posterity, hence the above pic. Wolverine refuses to ever talk about it (though he looks wistful sometimes), while Daken attempts to systematically destroy all evidence, including witnesses."

It had started as a series of alarms going off simultaneously at several private corporate and government labs. New York’s finest and its somewhat less so had all scrambled to deal with these events. Osborn’s Avengers had targeted, quite naturally, the break-in at Oscorp. The vigilante new Avengers had split up and tried to tangle the rest with the assistance of solo heroes.

Unfortunately, for all involved it soon became clear that there was only one team of super criminals at work and some very irritating teleportation devices. Both Avengers teams realized quickly that they could track these by the signals they emitted and, to both of their annoyance, villains and Avengers alike ended up in a three-way battle back at the “secret” hideout of the thieving and teleporting crew. 

"Shit! Scramble!" One of the five men cried out as the crew was flanked by the two teams. In five flashes, the thieves teleported in different directions but to their surprise they couldn’t leave the warehouse.

"Gentlemen, you are not going anywhere. I’ve blocked all transmissions from this location. Surrender before we liberate your limbs from your bodies. You’ll make better organ donors than thieves," Norman said, the intercom of his suit amplifying his voice.

"They’ve got us boxed! Get the thing, Max!" One of the masked men cried out.

"Don’t call me that idiot!" Max said and ported across the warehouse to one of the containers that they had stolen: it had a large biohazard sign emblazoned on it.   

"Whatever that is, bub, I suggest you drop it," Wolverine growled and popped his claws, taking the front line. 

"Unknown chemical. Daken, you’re up front! The rest of you, step back! That’s an order!" Norman barked and flew up to survey the situation. "You are all under arrest! Put aside the container, Max. You are surrounded, you don’t have a chance."

"I usually don’t agree with Storming Norman, but put that down and no one gets hurt." Spider-Man walked up with his hands spread, trying to reason with the man called Max.

"Yeah, _I_  don’t stand a chance, but  _they_  do. It’s you who’s gonna get hurt,” Max gloated and opened the container, drawing forth a glass vial of red liquid. “We didn’t steal all this shit without being prepared to deal with you - you’d be surprised what people create to deal with freaks like you. Have fun!” Max threw the vial to the ground, running away as he did. 

Daken and Wolverine were the closest ones to the crew and lunged after the thieves, but as they got closer to the shattered remains of the vial and the spilled liquid, both men dropped to their knees with a howl and a snarl.

"Wolverine!"

” _Stay away_! Trigger scent!” Wolverine growled, losing himself in the chemical that was bypassing all reason and humanity in him. He roared and threw himself at Spider-Man who barely avoided getting mauled by throwing the feral mutant back against the crates.

"I’m in control. I’m in  _control_ ,” Daken muttered and rocked on the floor, claws out and ripping at his own flesh. “No no no no, please no.” Feral growls and whines left him and he sunk into the floor shaking.

"Avengers, containment now! Take them out, and don’t let the thieves get away!" Norman ordered and flew after the fleeing men, blasting at them as he went. Sentry and Ms. Marvel joined him, taking a thief each as their target. The rest of Norman’s Avengers kept a safe distance made an uneasy semi-circle around Daken’s fallen form, weapons at a ready. The New Avengers split up in a similar manner over their teammate and the rest of the thieves.

Meanwhile, Wolverine noticed Daken, growling he stalked toward his son with every intent of gutting him, but stopped at the last moment, nostrils flaring and shaking his head as if to get rid of something. Daken looked up at him, eyes blown wide and lips slightly parted, looking all the part as if he’d blissed out on a truckload of valium.

Wolverine stopped.

"Hey, Logan. How are you?" Ms. Marvel asked cautiously. "We’ve got thieves getting away—"

"Does anyone else feel like really chill? I mean, I’m an easy going guy, but we shouldn’t be this mellow—" Ronin remarked, Mockingbird nodded and leaned on him, seemingly having a hard time with her balance.

On the floor, Daken had sprawled out with a doped grin on his face and Wolverine had sat down next to him, scenting him and blinking slowly. 

"Pheromones! He’s using pheromones to counteract the thingy," Spider-Woman said, speaking from experience. "Ehh, don’t get too close, unless you  _want_  to feel like a stoner for the rest of the day.”

"Say what?" Bullseye exclaimed, but couldn’t hold onto the anger at this revelation of his teammates hidden powers. In fact, he felt like he’d overdone the lithium.

"That’s not what was supposed to happen!" One of the captured thieves cried out as the Sentry hauled him back. "They were supposed to kill you!"

"Well, that didn’t work out so well did it. Now, how do we reverse the effect?" Barnes asked, trying to keep from wanting to give someone a hug and then have a nap.

"How am I supposed to know!? I just stole the stuff."

"Oh my god,  _what_  are they doing?” Mac asked with faint horror in his voice.

"I- I think he’s  _grooming_  him,” Spider-Woman replied, staring at the scene that was taking place on the floor. 

Wolverine had scooped up his son in his arms, pulled away the cowl, and was, there really was no other word for it,  _licking_  his hair our of his face. Daken didn’t seem to really mind it, only struggling slightly to get comfortable in his father’s grip and then relaxing utterly. 

"I think I just vomited a little in my mask," Spider-Man remarked.

” _Nobody_  is going to believe this,” Ronin said and dug up his smart phone. “Thank god for camera phones.”

He wasn’t the only one who had the same revelation for the potential blackmail material this presented. Photos were taken and film was shot to get the choicest bits of sweet extortion.

"Freudian field day," Karla smirked, covering her mouth with her hand, hiding her smile. "I could say so much about attachment theory just based on this."

"It’s kinda cute actually," Spider-Woman said as she tried to shake off the effect of the pheromones that still lingered thick over the room. Wolverine was still grooming Daken with his tongue and maneuvering him like a boneless kitten in his arms. Daken allowed it and nuzzled back at him, his nose scrunching up as Wolverine licked his face. Daken sneezed slightly. Wolverine licked him again.

"Uh, shouldn’t we kinda do something?" Mac wondered. There were some awkward stares across the room, most of the thieves had been captured, the teams assembled once more. There was little left to do, but to break up the father-son puppy pile and wait in Norman. 

Currently, the feral mutants were nearly purring and snuggling and Wolverine seemed to have finished “washing” his kid, settling on hugging him close and keeping him still. Daken seemed perfectly content, half-dazed and cuddly.

” _Ooohkay_ , Logan, let’s break this up and go home—” Spider-Man said, grabbing Wolverine by the shoulder. He did not expect the claws that once more came flying at him and only because of his spider-sense avoided another near maul. ”Yikes!”

Wolverine growled at him menacingly, hovering over Daken protectively.

” _Nice_  papa wolverine. I’m  _not_  trying to steal your baby.”

"Any other bright ideas?" Bullseye asked.

"We take them both into custody, that’s what, Hawkeye," Norman said, coming flying in and dumping the last thief unconscious on the ground.

"Then we’re going to have a problem, Osborn," Barnes said, readying himself for a fight, the New Avengers making a joint front to protect their friend. Osborn’s Avengers readied themselves in response. It was all a rather awkward and insincere attempt. 

There were a tense few moments that ran out in the sand as both teams calmed down despite themselves. 

"This is not working. All I want to do is go home, eat pizza and sleep," Ronin sighed and lowered his weapons. There was  a grumbling agreement from everyone.

"Worse than meditating with Danny."

"Hey!"

"Agreed," Ares chimed in and let his ax fall down. "There is no joy in battle here."

"So what now?" Both teams looked at each other sheepishly.

"Oh for the love of—" Bullseye sighed and rolled his eyes, drawing two arrows and — before anyone had the time to react — shot both Daken and Wolverine in the back of the head. Both mutants fell like dead to the ground. "You take yours, we take ours."

Everyone stared at him.

"What? It’s not like I killed them."

"Only you could do that, despite being drugged to the ears with happy peace pheromones," Karla remarked dryly.

"Thanks. I do try," Bullseye chirped self-satisfied and grabbed Daken, throwing him over his shoulder. "I’m never going to let him live this down."

"This NEVER happened!" Norman barked as the two teams went their separate ways, the crew of thieves being dragged off to the Hammer secure detention vans that had come to pick them up.

"Yeah, yeah, Normie. Just like every other time we meet," Spider-Man said and waved him off, still feeling comfortably Zen and oddly cuddly. 

"This is a fucking embarrassment," Mac gripped and slouched off with his team.

Wolverine was hauled off by Cage who carried the smaller man under and arm, grunting slightly. “He’s heavy for a tiny guy.”

"At least he’s not trying to go all Papa Wolverine on your bald head, it’s shiny enough as it is."

"You know what, Clint, pre-mature balding, that’s where you’re heading."

"Aww, shit. I’m too mellow to fight. I haven’t felt like this since I ate those muffins my neighbor made. I didn’t know about the marijuana until after I finished the entire box."

"Who knew that Daken could control pheromones? A heads-up would have been nice," Mockingbird grumbled.

"I knew." Spider-Man raised his hand, taking it down slowly at the stink eye he was receiving from everyone. "What? I thought everyone knew, it’s not like he’s shy about using them."

"He’s right about that," Spider-Woman said, walking arm in arms with Ms. Marvel. "You smell nice, Carol." Then she yawned widely.

"Thanks, Jess. Wanna go sleep in the spare room?" 

"Totally."

Hours later, Wolverine woke up and spend the rest of the evening staring at Clint’s phone that he’d “borrowed”, looping the video of Daken with a strange sense of fondness. He made a point of glaring murder at anyone who even thought about commenting about what had happened.

Across town, Daken came to his senses in the medical detention, strapped to a bed. He glared at Bullseye who had been poking at him and grinning maliciously. 

"You shot me."

"Yup. I also know your secret mutant powers now, and I’ve got you on tape getting a tongue bath from your Daddy. I wouldn’t be so cocky."

"Erase that file and I won’t make you cream your pants every time you see me. Though first, unstrap me "

"You’re bluffing."

"Try me. Unless you want to admit how bad you’ve got it for me to everyone."

"As if— gnk."

"Funny thing, that only works if you find me attractive. Now, the file, babe. Erase it, and I’ll really make you feel nice."

"You sonnuva— ahh, shit. Fine, it’s gone. It’s not the only one, asshole. Everyone got one."

"Then I’ll be paying  _everyone_  a visit.” 


End file.
